“Is this where I belong?”, is a question we often find ourselves stumbling upon. 

Imagine this: Ten years have passed since you bid farewell to the likes of college life; after a tough day at work you decide to wind down, journal, and go back to simple things that instigated the purest form of peace from deep within. You think of vast fields of farmland, tucked in the small village you visited every summer; the gentle breeze; how the uncle selling kulfis would pass near your house every day at 6 PM sharp, never too late and never on Sundays; when the elders in the family would peel oranges for the younger ones on long summer nights; the sound of ghungroos from the neighborhood aunt that teaches Bharatnatyam to young girls - you went there once, and fell in love with the art of dancing. And then a shift happens - you think of all the nights you partied away in clubs; dancing and letting loose with friends; attending concerts and impromptu road trips; the walks back from night clubs; the serenity of lying down with your friends and discussing life at 3 AM; and it brings you peace just the same. 

Often, I see myself existing in the olden generation, the 1900s, when scents and letters were the norm of communication, when Abhi Na Jao Chod Kar would play in the backdrop every night, where people found solace in scripts and shayaris, how every Sunday morning home would be filled with scents of kachoris and jalebis - the delicate ones covered in rabdi, when sitting with friends for picnics in the gardens - perfectly square sandwiches, and orange juice. 

A part of me feels so very away from the same generation, the generation that would stop its women from going out late, the same generation that committed heinous acts, the same generation whose traditional views often clash with my own. 

Other times, I can’t imagine myself away from the likes of the so-called GenZ. The sprint towards diverse globalization, increased opportunities, the freedom every nightingale of my childhood sang of, when every Saturday I walk back home with the calmness of the night evading my senses, when no one stops a group of friends from jumping into pools late at night, when choice is a privilege not a necessity. 

Then there are days I don’t see myself belonging - the days I wish to spend tucked in the corner of a library, where loud music and thumping of footsteps can’t be heard, the days I miss having Kadak chai from a roadside tapri, on the days when every ingrained moment of speculation seems irrefutable.

It all comes down to this - some days I belong to the muse of past, some to the gallery of future, but most days I belong with hundreds(if not more) like me, stuck in an endless museum of every parity that circumscribes the words of realism.
 

A Generation Stuck 

The year began perfectly as if the eternal spring had finally arrived in my life. At least that’s what I thought!

Two months into the new semester, we received a mail to go back home due to the outbreak of COVID-19. While for some it was, ‘YAY! We are going home!’, for me, it was, ‘Well… I just came back!’

Anyways, I packed my bags and bid farewell to my friends. While buildings sprinted, the memory lane of everything I was leaving behind for an indefinite time rolled in. It wasn’t just the people I was going to miss but something that was constant in the campus-sitting next to the lake with breeze brushing our face as we glanced at the star filled night sky.

I was introduced to outer space in the 4th standard and stars seized my attention the most. It’s all just so mesmerizing looking at the fireflies in space, light years away and when joined by lines, draw stories. Like Orion, the very first constellation I spotted in the countryside. Orion stands for a hunter in the Greek mythology, who fought with the scorpion sent by Gaia, the Earth goddess. To protect himself from the creature he hid in the sea but was killed by Artemis on Apollo’s instruction. After retrieving her friend’s body who she thought was an enemy, Artemis begged the gods to bring him back to life, the gods refused. So instead she placed a picture of him in the sky to look at every day.  

Sadly, the city lights may shine like stars but they do bring in a grey sky.

Meanwhile, the cities are on lock-down.  The COVID-19 apart from acting part Thanos was also doing some good to the planet and one of the results was the rare phenomena of clear starry nights in Delhi.

The winter skies of January, February and March bring the easiest constellations to view in the northern hemisphere.  These constellations can be seen by the naked eye, nonetheless, some stars as clusters are so light that one might need a telescope.  

My observations started with Orion positioned South-west. On day 1, the cluster of Hunter’s body was visible. Further, into observations on day 2, the stars of the bow and hand became clearer.  

Along with this, the second and third in my account were, Big Dipper and Small Dipper each consisting of seven stars. The two are the part of constellations Ursa Major and Ursa Minor respectively. These constellations are clearest in the Summer sky and start having their appearance in winters. Having the shape of pans, Big dipper lies in the northeast while Small dipper lies further north having Polaris- the ever-shining star, at the end of it’s handle.

The constellations too share a story in Greek mythology.

On day 5- Diagonally to Orion, Gemini-the twin brothers are positioned. The constellation has stars Castor and Pollux which signify the eyes of the twins. The other stars from the cluster appear lighter and require a telescope for tracing.

 Furthermore, I’m working on constellation Taurus having a red star in it, right above Orion. I keep on making the updates on my Instagram, just so everyone captures the beauty before, the stars shift to the west with spring.

Once we return, we’ll be busy with our schedules so why not spend time with ourselves. Take out the telescopes of our mind and discover ourselves in the sky.

One of my trances is camping in Ladakh seeing the stars out stretching to horizon, immersed in an awestruck emotion.

In this quarantine I rediscovered my Star Gazer. What about you?

Star Gazer

“Am I Audible?”, “Is my screen visible?”, “Ma’am, your voice is breaking”, “Sir, I am having some network issues”, “Thank You, Ma’am!”

The lingo of classes changed quite profoundly as we stepped into this new mode of learning. From requesting the teacher to explain the concept one more time to asking them to present the slide again, we all grew up in the lockdown.

A year or two ago, when each one of us, stepped out of our comfort zones, in hopes of finding a new home in the realms of SRM IST, no one anticipated to become a part of a family larger than each of us. Heading down those mystic lanes, taking a short cut to not miss the train,  hesitantly shaking hands with your new roommate, entering the Great Hall of Mess and the unexpected ‘running into your to-be best friend’, all these ‘firsts’ remain etched in our hearts.

With the beginning of a new semester, came the new year, 2020. Meeting old friends and whining together over the new subjects brought us together, like we had  never been separated. But as dramatic as all our lives are, it brought with it a turn of events, namely, a global pandemic. With heavy hearts we all temporarily bid adieu to running into our friends in the morning, having a feast at java or walking around the campus, only till seven-thirty of course.

Tiny rays of happiness shone through those grey clouds when we reconnected over Online Classes. The means of education might have changed but, the thrill to watch your mate go completely blank and the satisfaction when you understand a topic on the first go still remains unparalleled. The laughter and amaze started seeping back into our lives.

However, the secondary victims of this unforeseen setback were our teachers. The ones who would travel miles, 5 days a week, to impart knowledge, are now restricted to their homes. However, without backing down, collectively with an unfaded will, they brought the new mode of everyday teaching into being. The admiration for our teachers, who became learners for the past few months to be able to deliver knowledge over this new medium, deserves a huge round of applause. As they assisted us and remained undeterred with the situation, it was time to do our bit, helping them become  tech savvy, one step a day.

The “vacation” that we got gave us a chance to reflect on ourselves, discover what really excites us. Completing online courses was another level of delight. Scoring that internship online, brought the joy, words cannot express. And when the new semester started, we all returned captivated and rejuvenated; more than ever. Along  the same lines, for many the last few months have been challenging, but the sheer determination to not fall during the gloomy times of 2020, has helped us stay strong, collectively.

Some things never change, the dread to complete the assignments on time, or to score the highest marks in class still keeps us going. The friends that helped with the last minute hasty revision before the test, still call because they know very well. The laughter over scribbled drawings on the desk, sound ever so lively over the online Pictionary quests. The constant nudging to your friend to ask your doubt, still goes on over a WhatsApp text.

On the sunny side, it is only correct to say that virtual classes not only brought a change in how the world perceives learning, but also taught us the lesson, that learning never stops.

The world has changed, and so have we. The mind has accepted the change, but the heart still aches for the days that ended with a smile on our face. We always have embodied the will to strive continuously forward, and so we will. In our attempt to take a gander into a time when we will meet on-campus, we’ll rise to Learn, Leap, and Lead.  

Am I audible?

Childhood – A time of no responsibilities, worries or thoughts of tomorrow. A time where not skinning one’s knee or colouring inside the lines are the biggest obstacles in life. Most of us would gladly go back to those simpler times. But for some, childhood is a battlefield. Quite literally. They have to trade in their innocence and freedom for maturity and survival. Children are the future of the world, but for some, their own future is uncertain. This Children’s Day, let’s see the world through their eyes.

This is the story of those overlooked children and their bravery and how they manage to smile, despite fighting for their survival everyday.

Displaced by the Syrian War, Absi is a 10 year old who lives in Irbid, Jordan. At his age, probably everybody liked playing truant from school, but this little, innocent looking refugee has to do it to support his mother and sisters, in the absence of his father. He works 10-12 hours as a parking lot attendant everyday to earn 2 Jordanian diners, barely enough to keep his family afloat. The happiest moment in his life happened when his teacher told his employer that he was absenting from school to work at the garage. His employer decided to give him a raise, only if he attended school. Absi wants to become a teacher and create a better world than the one he grew up in.

Despite suffering from a physical disability and being a refugee kid in a foreign land, Baker is as stubborn as any five year old child can be. His adamant demands of going to school at a charitable foundation just go to show his resilience against a disease that does not allow him to walk. The treatment for Baker’s disability should have started three years ago, but the war in Syria reached his house and neighborhood, forcing his family to flee. Baker hopes to be a sports teacher when he grows up and enjoys cheering on his classmates as they play.

Lana Ahmad Hourieh and her brother Abdulsalmouh are your average teenagers, except for 2 facts. They are Syrian refugees surviving in Lebanon and they are extremely talented chess prodigies. Unlike usual sibling rivalries, theirs takes place over the chessboard. They have been playing since eight, and now chess has become an integral part of their lives as well as a coping mechanism. They are shy kids, adjusting to a new environment and the game has been their liberation. While for Lana chess is a way to calm down, Abdul likes chess because he can use it to defeat his peers and his sister. However, Lana is not one to back down easily either and the brother-sister duo continue excelling at the game and finding a new life, amidst their challenges.

Jannatul is a five year old whose name translates to “heaven”, but her life is anything but that. This little lady is a Rohingya refugee, who had to flee Myanmar with her mother and settle down in Bangladesh. Like any regular toddler, Jannatul loves eating fruits mostly because mangoes and jackfruits remind her of her homeland. While it is easy to get lost in the world’s largest refugee camp, Jannatul has found a home amidst victims of war and desolation. She enjoys going to school and reading books. Her favourite part is picture books and she spends hours colouring inside and outside the lines, painting this grim world with her shades of happiness and innocence.

While in our nation 14th November is for celebrating childhood, a lot of kids around the world do not get to even live their childhood. They do not know the comfort of a home or the security of a school. Yet somehow, they have the same innocence and curiosity sparkling in them. Some find it in chess, some in colouring books. This Children’s Day, let us celebrate  and remember these refugee children, who despite their hardships, make the most of their childhood. Here’s to hoping for a Happy Childrens Day!

A Generation Stuck

Star Gazer

Am I audible?

The Children of War Here

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